halloween

tonight is halloween...big surprise i know, but october 31 has snuck up on us. we're really not that big into the day, so we were out late last night buying our last minute candy and treats. this is the first year that e has ever ventured out into the world of trick or treating. i'm excited because our church has decided to shut the doors on the one day a year that people are guaranteed to come and knock on your door! what a novel concept, asking people to leave the nice comfy church and get out into the world...it's almost like something that Jesus would have challenged his disciples and followers to do. then John 6:60-66 comes into play...and Jesus' followers become more concerned about what they want to do than what He is about...

why??

when did we get to the point as the church that we really think that some of the things we are doing are good ideas? why in the world do we go from doing things that are good and right because they are changing people's lives for Christ, to doing things that are good and right because they make our lives easier. churches spend millions to get more people in for services because it is easier to put 3000 people in a room once than to have 750 people in 4 services; we have some who have made a mockery of life and think it's ok; we have others who just lose sight of what's happening around them and get burned out, get caught up in the "me" of it, and need to re-focus. somewhere along the way we became more involved in the machine known as church than in the ONE who CREATED the church. we have lawsuits, threats, and pastors making mistakes...but hey, who hasn't made a mistake? the problem comes when you look down the road and realize that you have strayed away from your first love as a follower of Him. i think pastors, staff (including me many times!!), leaders, congregants, and those on the outside all get caught in the trap. we go from looking at what is best for LIFE CHANGE to looking at what is best for me...i serve 50 hours a week at this place, why can't we make it a little easier? when does spending millions on something that changes the way our parking lot looks take precedence over missions to the people in our back door? trust me, i see this everywhere, but choose not to reveal it all.

why is it so easy to fall in love with Jesus, but so hard to love others who have known Him for a while? i don't think Paul, Peter, or John were like that. Peter is even credited by some to have started the church, but he was more about a relationship with his JESUS than anything else. there are still a few of them out there that have it right though. some even have taken the time to stop and quit trying to figure things out so that God can talk to them...that's a novel thought, but hey...who's got time for that?

last thought...where does the Bible talk about church membership? i'm not really against it, but i don't see it as a sticking point. what is the benefit of church membership? does anyone know? i think it's vital to be a part of a local church; to worship with them, to have community with them, to serve with them, to give with them, and to minister to them, but i don't see anything about having to be a member...just a thought.

i'm online, but who cares and why?

i'm on facebook, myspace, and youtube. the big question is why? the bigger answer is...to stay connected. isn't it funny, that we live in neighborhoods, work in offices, hang out at the ballpark, and STILL don't feel connected enough? just a though...

it's FOOTBALL time...playoffs

this saturday begins the playoffs for d and e. they are excited, and they are both practicing in the horrible weather here. why in the world would they practice in the rain and mud??? because it's FOOTBALL time. something to look forward to in the middle of it all...

Change the World

are you living your LIFE to the fullest? what is YOUR LIFE SAYING?

a friend challenged me the other day saying the he wanted to "Change the World." then i saw a great movie the other night…Evan Almighty. the whole movie revolved around one man who wanted to Change the World. the only problem is, God showed up and wanted him to actually do it, but do it God’s way. am I willing to let God ruin my “plans” for Changing the World or do I like my plans better than anything God? tough question that has to be answered.

a dad's wish

as a dad with 2 boys playing football for the Franklin Cowboys the dream is always that Lane would get to experience football as well. here's what that might look like if he did. who says a blind guy can't play? yes, that's my hand holding his head up...the helmet is a little heavy!

Fall BREAK??

so just when you think you're going to get a vacation, things happen. this weekend we took the boys on a fall BREAK journey. Lane went to the Nanny and Pop's and D and E went to Dollywood and the glorious redneckopolis known as Pigeon Forge. we stayed in a humongous 7 bedroom cabin there with some friends. we enjoyed the rides @ Dollywood, the go-carts @ The Track, and then we got the call.

we got the call from Nanny that they thought Lane had stopped breathing. they had to call 911. the first reaction was to assess the situation, then ask the hard question, "are you saying he's dead?", and then head out. we left D and E in capable hands with our friends, then booked it to East Tennessee Children's Hospital.

we got there right after Pop and Lane did, and all is well. he probably had a small seizure that caused his breathing to be super shallow. as always, better safe than sorry. plus, Lane probably wanted to go see some of his friends he hasn't been around in 10 years...

then tuesday night, D took a helmet to the arm during football practice and proceeded to have a gash that was deep enough for stitches. we jetted off to the Cool Springs Walk-In Clinic for a visit with Dr. Brad. he cleaned the cut...which almost made me puke...and then used super-super-glue to close it. amazing! D was a little worked up over the thought of getting sewed up, but he made it though fine. the only problem is that he doesn't have a super cool stitch in to get some female sympathy, but he'll be fine!

sometimes...

sometimes God allows you to laugh, sometimes you get to cry, and other times you have to sit back and wonder just what in the world is really going on. the reality i always find is that He needs to get the glory regardless. when we act like idiots at church, God is still God. He needs the glory. the problem is we have people trying to step in and take 'just a little bit of it" for themselves. whether it's one person, 12, or 54 it's still simple...it's sin!



when we have troubles in our lives God is still God. when we sit back and wonder why things happen to us like they do, God is still God. funny isn't it. or maybe not...maybe He's trying to break what our view of "right" is. maybe He wants us to reshape our thinking to understand that we really aren't in control, even though we want to be. i can't cure cancer...i really want to. i can't bring people back from the dead...though that might be a wish of mine for some people. i can't heal Lane...i'm still helpless on this one. BUT...i can choose to understand that He already knew this, and He gave me His grace to cope, so i'm not tempted to steal HIS glory...



maybe God wants less of my excuses and more of my letting Him push me around in His chair He built for me...

so it's come to this...

yesterday was the big day. we had over 1500 people at church, and over 1300 voted (a few were absentee ballots but still a bunch of people were here just for the junk). it was funny that the ballot was so forthright. this wasn't some sort of metro ammendment that was for or against marriage or whatever, it was pretty straight forward. people still complained, and hooted and howled (thanks Jerry and Dennis) that this vote was foul, but in the end, only about 4% of the total church membership...listed at over 6800 and 20% of those voting wanted Jerry gone. so, i guess the reality is, the people have spoken. they want to be lead by the pastor and they want Jerry Sutton to be their pastor. only time will tell how much sillier this will get and how much more of a black eye this will give our church in the community. who cares what Christians think? who cares what other baptists think? truthfully i don't. i care what the watching world things. i care that people are using this as another excuse to hate church, God, and all that is related to Him...pretty big consequences follow sin. just think on that...

praying today

today is a wild day. two polar opposite events are taking place in my life within 3 hours of each other.

first, we're voting today in church. i know, exactly what Jesus died on the cross for. so a group of people could grumble and moan because they want things their way. i believe James 4 has something to say about that...

secondly, we're having a BIRTHDAY PARTY for Lane today. it's going to be a blast. 10 years old, what a rush! we've had so many people that we don't even know calling and rsvp'ing for his party, that Missy and i might just be a little overwhelmed when it gets going.

so, regardless of what you think is right or wrong...realize that the world is going on around you. good times, bad times, and weird times are all happening. i pray i see God in it all today!

Happy 10th Birthday!

today is an amazing day. today LANE BRYSON WILSON turns 10 years old. so, instead of a blog, this is a letter to Lane...

Dear Lane,

What can we say? We never thought you would live to be 10 minutes old but 10 years was never even a thought. The years have flown by, and we cherish every thought we have of you and every time we think about you and your gigantic smile, we have to laugh ourselves!

We remember the first time that we had the chance to see you. You were so small! You could have fit in the palm of someone’s hand or in the pocket of a pair of pants. It was tempting so many times to shove you deep into one of our pockets and just run out the door. We could take you away from the hospital and take you into our world…and into the pain and reality that we were helpless. The only thing that kept us from grabbing you and running was the staff. We knew that the people who were there at the hospital watching you each day were there because they loved you and wanted to see you get better.

No matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t make you well. That’s the hardest part about being a parent…looking at you and realizing that we could have grabbed you and run away with you, but you were where you needed to be. You were at a place where you were cared for, loved, and most importantly taken care of…by people who knew a whole lot more than us. That is probably what it is supposed to be like though. We should have handed you over to God immediately and trusted Him to take care of you, but that was really difficult. We live in a world that teaches us to fix things, and if we can’t fix them, find someone else who CAN. The horrid reality however was that we couldn’t find anyone else to fix you. Even the doctors and the nurses who loved you, cried for you, and found batteries for your tape player when your music stopped, couldn’t fix you. We found that out the hard way. We realized that you were out of our hands when you were about 2 months old. When you lost your IV’s we were out of hope. We couldn’t trust a doctor to fix you…he didn’t have any more doctor tricks. We couldn’t trust the staff, the friends, or the family either…we were ALL helpless. Then God reminded us that you were on loan to us. You were NEVER supposed to be ours, but you are HIS on loan to us for however long he deems necessary.

You helped us realize that our lives were so out of control. We honestly thought we had control of some of those things. We thought that we could overcome your “problems” and things would eventually be ok. God knew we couldn’t handle it on our own and allowed us to struggle just long enough to throw up our hands and completely remove “US” from “YOU”. Guess what? You’re alive today because God had so much bigger plans than we could have dreamed up.

If we had it to choose, we would never have chosen it this way. We would have NEVER chosen to have a “special” child. We wanted normal. We wanted routine. We wanted what everyone else had. Then we realized that God was giving us a gift in you. We get to see you grow up. We get to see you defy the odds. We get to see you on your best and worst days, but we still realize that each of those days are on loan from God, and when we get to be too possessive, we have to take our hands off again. God’s been really great at allowing us to remove our hands multiple times. He has been there the whole time, watching over you and giving you enough breaths to survive exactly how HE wants. He didn’t call us and ask if it was ok, and we’re glad He didn’t. We would have missed out on so much.

We would have missed:
 Mom coming to ask Jesus into her heart in 1998 because she was sick of playing the game. She wanted REAL life change, not a new paint job on the old life.
 Realizing that the doctors and nurses in the NICU have weird lives. They don’t go home at the end of the day and “deprogram” from it all. Many of them stop by late at night because they continue to think about the babies that are trusted to them.
 Getting to know that EVERYONE has problems in their lives. Our “problem” turned out to be the greatest gift ever…you!
 Your brothers getting a chance to see God at work. You have overcome every obstacle in front of you. They know that God is in control.
 Dyllan having the biggest heart for others…because he would NEVER let anyone hurt you.
 Eli letting you grab, push, hit, and roll all over him. How awesome to know that he sees you as his brother…nothing else. He really loves you!
 You patting your chest when you answer the question, “Where does Jesus live?” You know He’s in your heart…I don’t know how, but I want to make sure I live everyday knowing that one day…you’re going to walk, talk, and see…better than anyone ever did here on earth. One day, you’ll be fixed!
 April 17, 2006…my LIFE speaks being born because we had come to the end of our road…and found that God wanted us to trust Him more and more…

We got to meet so many incredible people because you were born. We met incredible doctors, nurses, social workers, ambulance drivers, pilots, and other parents who were just like us.

As your Dad, I remember being so overwhelmed the first time 10 years ago that I walked into the NICU to see you lying there in your bed. You were covered in saran wrap. I didn’t know why. I knew there had to be a reason, but that reason escaped me. I couldn’t get past the fact that you had 10 fingers, 10 toes, and you were perfect. You were a little small, but you were still perfect.

When Mom finally got to see you, she immediately went into Mom mode. She began talking to you, singing to you, and praying for you. How ironic, that the person that carried you inside of her for 23 weeks was now trusting someone else to get you to our house.

Lane, Happy 10th Birthday. Thanks for letting us learn so much about God because of you. Thanks for not hating us because we brought you into this world, but please know, God had to be in charge, because we would have messed it up for you. We would have chosen “normal” and missed out on you being who God created you to be!

Love,
Mommy and Daddy!

It's Coming!!

a day is coming that i never thought i would ever happen. Tomorrow, October 4, 2007 will celebrate 10 years of LANE'S life. he's come so far from 1 pound and 4 ounces and 11 inches long. What a BLESSING. i have to admit, this morning while i was feeding him and listening to Daughtry's song, "Home" i couldn't help but think about how this home on earth won't compare to his true home in heaven.

find someone to smile at today!

i was reminded

i was reminded this morning on the way to take the boys to school, that God doesn't worry. i was reminded because i had begun to worry in my self that things were getting out of hand with Him, and that He might be needing my help. i remembered when my littlest prayed, that God would be ok today...he really meant it. he wants God to have a good day...then i started thinking...when has God NOT had a good day? the answer has to be simple...HE IS. so, He doesn't have bad days. He CREATED days...just something to think about today.